I'll never be caught dead......

Early this morning, I found 2 pictures of a colleague in my mailbox who, after much deliberation, decided that they were her best pictures to be posted on our corporate website for a feature on 'the day in the life of an employee'. Talk about putting your best face forward.

The first one is just a normal profile picture with her smiling sweetly. I have no problem with that. Now, the second picture.....maybe she is just trying to show us the "I'm-cuter-than-the-powerpuff-girls-combined" side of her, but it really is not funny when you are over 30 and posing with a kawaii "V" sign with your hands sticking to your face.

The V pose, or any other cutesy hand sign poses are strictly for beings below 5 (for boys) and 10(for girls). Any attempt by anyone to take pictures in these poses beyond the ages is vomit inducing. At this point I am tempted to pose a picture of my male colleague who committed this offence not so long ago, but he has recently shown interest in a member of the opposite sex and I do not want to put an abrupt end to it.

I will never be caught dead posing with the V sign. If you can dig out a picture of me in that pose, I'll buy you a meal. No, make it two (but you must promise to destroy it afterwards). Neither will I (in ascending order of grossness) be caught dead:

1. Wearing low V neck t-shirts that dips all the way down to my torso
2. Scratching my crotch in public
3. Hanging out with my ex-boss stinky
4. Wearing denim shorts

Some of you must wonder why I put wearing denim shorts after hanging out with stinky. Its a close fight I admit, but if I hang out with stinky, I can stand at a distance away from him. If I wear denim shorts, everyone will stand at a distance away from me. I've encountered many gross middle aged men who thinks wearing tight denim shorts is the "in" thing and can accentuate their "curves". I find it plain disturbing and have nightmares afterwards. Denim shorts are only for ladies with tight tushes and slim cellulite free gams.

Now you know my ultimate nightmare: Stinky in low V neck t-shirt and denim shorts scratching his crotch in public.