That sickening feeling

It is 2am in the morning and the sickening feeling is still there. I had a nightmare.

I visited my Dad and Mum in our hometown after not seeing them for years. I saw them from afar and as I walked closer, I was shocked.
My Dad, whom I've not seen is years seemed to have aged eons. His whole head was a vastly white, skin wrinkled and walks ever so slowly.
But I was not prepared to see my Mum. Why was she holding a blind man's stick? Why did she need to feel her way around? Can't she see?
She couldn't. She was blind. And she lost half her body weight.
I ran over to her to hold her, and frantically ask her: "What happened to you? Why are you blind? Why did you lose so much weight?" To which she just gave a smile, a shrug and a "Yeah, I've lost some weight lately"
My Dad was behind, just watching her steps.
We reached the house where they stay, which I did not recognize, but had a strange feeling of familiarity. I helped my Mum through the door, but before I could walk her into the house, I couldn't suppress it any longer.
I turned the other way and walked out of the door and just cried. Just cried and asking why. It was exactly the same feeling I had when I dreamt of my grandfather after he died. It was a feeling of immense helplessness and grief.
I stood at the gate with my feet planted to the ground, temporarily immobilized. I looked out into the neighbourhood and cried out even harder. Inconsolable.

I woke up heart pounding, eyes wet and the images still freshly imprinted on my mind.
I am trying to get back to sleep but I couldn't.
I needed to blog this to remind me to be a better son, before its too late.